On buying condoms for the first time in years.

I truly can't remember the last time I bought condoms. A full year dry spell will do that do you.

I don't like condoms to start with, but this is a necessary protection. So I bought the thinest I could find. Two different brands. And I picked up some lube too. Because it was cherry flavored.

I don't need lube for sex. Ever. I get wet and gushing at the touch of a man.

But I need it when I masturbate. Need a wet clit to enjoy it.

So here I was standing at the cash register with a PS3, two boxes of condoms and lube.

The cashier managed to keep a straight face while wishing me to have a good evening.